Got Time?

Being a full-time mommy of four children can be very overwhelming. There are days when I don't remember if I even took a shower or not. However, I am learning the art of time management and delegation. Those are the secrets to a happy home. What prompted me to post this was I've had a couple of friends ask me how I do it with such a large family. (They have no clue that I actually have a small family compared to some of my friends and most of the LDS population.) I thought I would share some of my "secrets" for saving time, money, and most importantly..... your sanity.

I have been a pack rat for most of my life. I have trouble throwing away things. I think it stems from being a military brat and moving so much during my childhood. You tend to get attached to stuff since that's the only consistency in your life. However, I have learned how to manage SOME of that in my life. In turn, it has saved me a lot of time in the long-run. For example, I used to keep little pieces of paper or envelopes or whatever had notes on it and it got out of hand. I purchased a little miniature spiral notebook and I write down phone numbers, addresses, contact information, etc... and I have divided the information into categories. Now, when I want to keep a number or contact I just write it into my notebook and throw away the business card or piece of paper. Also, when I want to look up the information it's right there and I don't waste valuable time sorting through business cards, etc.... It's great!!!

Another thing I have done is purchase a cork board and a dry-erase board. I have them mounted on the wall right by the back door. I call it my "brain" and I use it on a daily basis. I put important hand-outs from school pinned on the cork board. I also have calendars to help me keep up with different schedules, etc... On my dry-erase board I have a monthly calendar that I keep updated. I use a color-coded system to keep track of my children's activities and meetings. I don't know what I ever did before I used the boards. I save so much time because I just look at my day the night before and I have it all planned out. I can also refer to it when I make appointments and I don't have to worry about missing out on anything. It has literally transformed my life.

When you have a large family to feed one of the biggest issues is what's for dinner? Well.... I have the neatest group of friends and we have joined together and formed a Frozen Food Swap group. It's great! We get together once a month and we literally swap food. This is how it works: let's say you have eight people in your group.... You make 8 identical meals (and we have set up some guidelines such as it needs to have at least 6 servings, include two pounds of protein, etc...) and you show up with 7 at the swap already prepared, packaged, and frozen (because you keep the 8th for yourself), and you leave with 7 different frozen meals that you can heat up anytime you need. It has saved me a ton of money, time, and my family just LOVES the meals. We try and plan the meals ahead of time. We discuss ideas of what we want to make the month prior and decide as a group what each of us will make. The neat thing is that you are limited only by your imagination. There are literally thousands of freezer meals recipes online. We also have some wonderful cooks in our group so it works out for us. I try and save the meals for when I don't feel like cooking or on Sunday so I don't have to cook. Most of the meals last for two days and so I have plenty of carry-over from month to month. If you haven't tried it, you should. It's definitely worth it for me.

Delegate! Delegate! Delegate! I cannot stress that enough. It doesn't matter if you only have one or two kids... take it from me... start now! I made the mistake of trying to be the "super mom" to my kids. It does them NO justice. They need to learn how to clean and be a part of a household. The boys need to learn just as much as the girls. My boys scrub toilets, do the dishes, and help with laundry. They vacuum, mop, sweep floors, and help with dusting. There is nothing they can't do. Of course, I am just as guilty as anyone else about trying to do too much by myself. The other day my two-year old took ALL the books off the bookshelf and I got so upset with him. My first instinct was to put the books back into the bookshelf. However, I reprimanded him and then asked HIM to clean it up. Can you believe he did it? All by himself! Now I know that he can do it in the future and that he understands. How does this save time? Imagine all the things you could do if your children help you? It should be a team effort. You are a family and everyone should contribute their fair share.

Know when to call the pros. That's a tough one. I am very frugal and hate to waste money. I try to do things myself when I can, but sometimes I just have to throw in the towel. When school started I thought I would have a lot of free time. I was going to have all the kids in school for most of the week and so I had all these dreams of what I could accomplish while they were gone. Little did I know that I would be more involved with school than ever!! I have tons of field trips, parties, classroom projects, and activities to help with. The work is never done. I also volunteer at the schools and that takes up a few hours a week. Needless to say, my plans had to change. I started to paint my walls and only got halfway finished. You can actually see the line where I couldn't reach anymore. It's sad, actually. So... my husband and I have decided to hire a good friend of ours from church to help us finish the long list of projects and maintenance that we need to do. There is no shame in asking for help. It's truly a win-win situation because we are helping our friend by giving him the business, and he is going to help us maintain our beautiful home. In the end, it will save me time and I will be able to spend the limited time I DO have being involved in my children's school... which is truly priceless.

Last, but definitely not least, learn how to say "no". This is one of those things I am working on. When you try to please everybody else then you and your family are going to feel the consequences. If someone gets upset at you because you don't have the time or can't do it then THEY are the ones with the problem... not you! A true friend will understand and not make you feel bad. This is when it is necessary to prioritize your life. Make sure that you put your family, your marriage, and your values at the top. If something can compromise any of those things, then respectfully decline. It's not hard. The first time you say "no" it's kind of hard and you feel like apologizing and giving excuses... but it gets easier. Again, I am not saying that I am a "pro" at this, but I am getting better at it. I actually made it my New Year's resolution for this year. I have found that I am less stressed and that I have more time. My husband tried to tell me, but I wouldn't listen. I am so glad that I finally did.

You can't literally add hours to your 24-hour day, but you can give yourself more time. Start keeping track of wasted time. For example, I used to spend between 4-6 hours a day MINIMUM watching television!! I didn't realize it. This was my usual line-up: News/Morning Show (1 hr), People's Court (1 hr), Oprah (1 hr), Reality Shows (2 hrs), Late Night Shows (2 hrs). Well... we purchased a DVR. It is a digital video recorder. You can program your shows and watch them later. I love it because I can fast forward through all the commercials. I never realized how much time is wasted watching commercials!! The added bonus is that it records live t.v. and so if you are interrupted then you can rewind and watch what you missed, or else record what you are watching and see it later. Needless to say, I don't watch as much television. I have a handful of shows that I pre-record and I watch them with my husband. I fold clothes and work on projects while I watch those shows. I feel like I am multi-tasking. I also LOVE to do my abdominal work-outs during the shows as well. (Can't say I don't have time to do it anymore!)

I hope some of the information is useful to you. It's amazing how much time we waste. Figure out where it's going and you will find time to do things you enjoy. With all the things I have to do, I still find time to go out with friends, scrapbook, AND work on this blog. If I can do it, ANYONE can do it!! Try it and see.
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Time is what prevents everything
from happening at once.
~John Archibald Wheeler
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