Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Window of Opportunity

Time sure flies when you're having fun. It also flies when you're not...doesn't it? Either way, you look back and realize that your kids are growing up before your eyes and there is nothing that you can do to turn back the clock. The most important lesson I have learned is that there is no time like the present. You can either sit back and wish things to be, or you can do something about it. When it comes to raising kids that could not be more true. It is especially true when it comes to dealing with children with issues.

There is a window of opportunity to most things. The first thing I think of is discipline. How many kids have I seen who hit their moms and they are not reprimanded! What about babies who throw tantrums or hit and their parents just shrug their shoulders? Little problems like these turn into much bigger problems when they are older. Children with ADHD or Autism require a much more structured environment and consistent discipline. They cannot be taught that their challenge can be used as an excuse. They learn this early on. Treating them like any other normal child is the best way to love them. They will learn to respect you and others in the long-run.

Another window of opportunity occurs with therapy/treatment. You can't wait until the child is five before treating things like ADHD or Autism. Treatment doesn't have to involve drugs either. Learning how to deal with situations and having a "game plan" is vital. My husband and I read tons of books and talked with professionals about different methods and ways of dealing with these issues. However, experience has taught us that "professionals" don't always know what is best for your child. You need to use your gut instincts and common sense. If you know your child is having trouble or difficulties and the "professionals" are trying to tell you that you need to wait or "just give them time" and re-evaluate.... don't miss out on that "window" and do something NOW! Sometimes you need the time to figure out what is happening with your child. For example, it took us years to figure out what was happening with our daughter. If we would have waited or done nothing then the outcome could have been detrimental.

A very important "window" occurs in diagnosis. Sometimes if your child is not diagnosed properly or if it takes too long then the symptoms can worsen. You might end up with another problem. This is when children are misdiagnosed and then given unnecessary drugs. I see it happen all the time. I am so thankful that we were aggressive in finding out what was happening with our daughter. When I went online I read so many stories of people who were misdiagnosed with schizophrenia or other mental diseases because of advanced stages of Wilson's Disease. The symptoms mimic other conditions. Also, in my older children I think that taking action early on helped them cope with the challenges of school and other social settings. We were able to teach them social skills and other vital lessons that they will need for the rest of their lives.

I see these opportunities as a blessing. We are given the tools and knowledge to use in making such judgments concerning our children. It's important to remember that we are their advocates. It's up to us to make sure that they are healthy, happy, and safe. Remember that years go by so quickly. My oldest is already twelve years old and I just can't believe it! One day I will see him a grown man with a family of his own. It's up to me and my husband to make sure that we take advantage of these windows of opportunity in their lives to teach them and to guide them. It's up to us to make sure that we are proactive in finding out what their strengths and weaknesses are so that we can better prepare them for life. We may not be professionals in psychology or medicine, but we are "professionals" in our own right. We have an obligation to use those skills and education we have acquired to be the best parents that we can possibly be.
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