Does my child have Autism?

If you have a child that developed normally from birth and then all of sudden you notice a regression in speech, motor skills, or eye contact.....chances are there is something wrong. Also, if you have a child that fails to meet the "normal" milestones and seems to be in "their own little world" most of the time, or seems to avoid people or social interaction.....chances are there is something wrong. Don't wait to seek medical help or intervention. Early intervention is key!!

The first step is the diagnosing part. This is the hardest part for many parents. Some doctors want to dismiss what parents tell them or they are too busy to listen. You are your child's advocate....don't ever forget that! You know your child better than anyone and you have been blessed with intuition and "motherly or paternal" instinct. Fight for testing as if your child's life depended on it....'cause in reality, it does. Every state has its own laws and provisions for testing. Find out what they are in your area and utilize every resource available to you. If you can't find help in your area then look elsewhere. We live in Montgomery and ended up going to Children's Hospital in Birmingham to get the help WE needed. Lastly, don't give up! This is crucial! It may seem like all hope is lost and you have nowhere else to turn. If you look hard enough, you will find the answer. Trust me. :)

The next step is treatment. Once you have your child diagnosed or "labeled" then you have the ammunition you need to start treatment. With our child, he needed occupational therapy and speech therapy. He qualified for the Early Intervention Program of Alabama. He received the services free of charge and we were able to get him help in preschool. He had a Special Education representative come and help him with social skills, language, and other deficiencies. Unfortunately, not all teachers are taught how to deal with kids with autism. Most people think that if you have autism then you are also mentally retarded. That is so sad. Most of the kids I have met who have autism are among the brightest and creative people I know. Our child is great at math, piano, spelling, reading, and computers. That brings me to another point. Make sure you expose your child to various outlets. You won't know unless you try. I never imagined that my child had a gift for the piano. He learned how to play in one lesson! He memorized all the keys in a couple hours.....including the sharps and flats! We are definitely trying to develop that gift with him.

Lastly, I want to discuss Autism in general. Where do I begin? Autism is not a single condition or set of symptoms. There is a BROAD spectrum and so you can have a child who has it and can barely talk, while another child sounds like a "little professor". There are some who can't tolerate any noise, while others will just compensate. Not all children with autism are unsocial. My child is very social, but he just suffers from impulsiveness and immaturity. He can also become overstimulated faster than "normal" kids. Another point I want to make is that unlike other conditions such as Down's Syndrome or physical handicaps, you can't just look at a child and know they have autism. Most aren't born with any unusual physical traits. If you are a parent who has been blessed with normal healthy children, think twice about judging other parents who are struggling with this issue. You don't know how many times I heard: "you just need to discipline him more" or "there is nothing wrong with him, that's just an excuse". Boy....do I wish they were right!! In retrospect, we disciplined my second child more than my first because we were so determined that he did not end up like our first. We were definitely more strict and we expected more out of him. We just didn't know.....

My child has PDD- NOS. That stands for Pervasive Developmental Disorder-Not Otherwise Specified. This is a wonderful site I have found :
http://www.autismspeaks.org/navigating/pdd_nos.php
It explains it better than I can and provides a lot of advice and suggestions for parents with kids who have this challenge. It even discusses some of the challenges parents face. Very good stuff!
PDD-NOS is on the "higher functioning" side of the scale. There are days when I actually have to remind myself that there is anything wrong with my child because he will behave so well. Then there are THOSE days when I am reminded. His behavior can fluctuate from one hour to the next. It is soooo unpredictable. Usually, if I can minimize the stimuli and control his diet then everything is good. However, when you come from a Latino family who is usually loud, excited, and definitely likes to eat "good food" then it is a big challenge. The solution is to try and educate your family as much as you can. I have to warn you that there will be many skeptics. There will be some moments of frustration....but don't give up. They will eventually come around and learn to accept your child as he is.

It never ceases to amaze me how far parents are willing to go for their children. I have a friend who has a son with autism and she drives him to a special preschool every day (Mon-Fri) that is two hours away, comes home to tend to her other little ones, and then picks him up in the afternoon so that he can get the education and therapy that he needs. Unfortunately, our area does not offer ABA therapy and so she is left with no other option. I also know of many parents who put their children in a special private school (although they REALLY can't afford it) in our area that will accept children with autism because public schools will not do their job. We had a heck of a time with our son in kindergarten. It's so sad 'cause that's supposed to be the funnest year and the most memorable. For us, it was very memorable......but not for good reasons. We ended up with a teacher who had no patience and did not know how to deal with kids that had challenges. After a month of trying and working with the school, we finally decided to homeschool him. That was the best decision we could have made. I knew he was smart, but didn't realize HOW smart he was. He learned to read in just a few weeks and by the time we finished he was ready for first grade. He goes to a wonderful private school now and when they tested him, he reads on a high school level and he is at least one or two years ahead in all of his subjects. We are so proud of him!

For those of you struggling....just know that there is light at the end of the tunnel. It may not look that way now, but one day you will find your answer just as I did. Every child is different whether they have challenges or not...that's just a given. We as parents just have to figure out what is best for our kids. Just educate yourself. Read lots of books and surf the internet. Be careful of people who try and prey on the vulnerable! There is a lot of misinformation and many wacky websites. Use your common sense and it doesn't hurt to pray. Pray for your children and pray that you will be inspired to make the right decisions.
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Our children are tiny rays of hope and love sent to us from above.
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