Everyone dreams of having a child who is brilliant.....a "baby Einstein". However, sometimes having a child who is "gifted" can be just as challenging as having a child who has learning disabilities. I have had to make some very difficult decisions concerning my #1 and his education. It has been a challenge all his life trying to find the right school for him. Weighing his social progress and balancing that with his academic achievement and potential has been even harder. We don't want to hinder his progress, but we also don't want for him to feel like he doesn't belong because he is so much younger than his peers in the classroom.
I want to recap on my son's past because I think it's important to know in order to understand what I am about to discuss. First of all, he was a normal and healthy baby until about age three when we noticed that he had more energy than the typical child. He couldn't behave in preschool and the teachers all told me he had all the signs of ADHD. I took him to a psychologist who confirmed the diagnosis. We placed him in a different school each year from that point on (trying to find the perfect fit) until second grade when I decided to homeschool. We knew that he was smart. When he was three years old we bought him his own computer because he knew how to use it from the time he was barely two! We bought some preschool software and noticed that he was mastering the math and English sections very quickly. By the time he started kindergarten he was already reading, subtracting, adding, multiplying, and doing fractions. He could also read a clock with hands. In first grade his teacher was shocked when he told the cafeteria how much change he needed back after purchasing his lunch with a $10 bill. When I homeschooled him I realized that the reason he wasn't "behaving" in school was because he was extremely bored. We finished second and third grade in less than a year. In math he was actually doing some pre-calculus. He loved the idea of "imaginary numbers" and he LOVED graphing and geometry. He was like a sponge and I couldn't keep up. It was as if a young man was trapped in a kid's body and I could sense the frustration.
After attempting traditional public school for a couple years we decided to put him in a special school that was known for many things, including teaching children who were extremely bright but who did not fit the "mold" of traditional thinking. This past year has been the best year for our son. He has done extremely well academically and his self-esteem is now soaring compared to last year. That is what we had hoped this new school would accomplish. However, by the middle of the school year I was made aware that he was progressing at a far faster rate than we had anticipated. He was having to go to the High School classes in order to be properly challenged. I did not have a problem with this since he was still with his "peers" during most of his social time. He also seemed to enjoy being around the older kids.
Well....when I met with his teacher and the Director of the school last week I was told that they did an extensive test on him to see what grade level he was testing at for various subjects and to give us a better picture of his academic progress. This was a test they did not get to do often. The director knew that he would test high, but I have to admit that I was shocked when I saw that he tested at >13 grade level for all of his subjects except for writing where he still tested way above grade level for NEXT year! The thing that blew my mind was the fact that he was already at a grade higher than he was supposed to be since we basically "skipped" third grade in public school. In my heart I knew what was about to happen next.... it was a most dreaded decision and one I knew I should not take lightly.
The Director told me because of the schedule for next year, there was no way to work high school classes into his 8th grade schedule. We only had two choices. Choice #1 was to go ahead and put him in 8th grade where he would not be challenged. Choice #2 was to put him in High School and promote him to 9th grade. I did not want to have to make this choice. My first question, of course, was if they thought he would be ready SOCIALLY. They assured me he was. My next concern was if they could work out a way for him to be with his own age group at least part of the day in the beginning. They told me they could work it out during the last two hours of school. He could either be a peer tutor or teacher assistant. They would call it his "elective" and they would do it for as long as he needed to help with the transition.
I went home and discussed it with my husband. He and I weighed the pros and cons. We also discussed the possibility of homeschooling him. However, my son had expressed to us how much he loved this new school and that he loved it better than homeschool. We ultimately decided that we had placed him in this school so that he could excel. He had proved to everyone that he was ready to go forward and so why should we hold him back? Our plan was to place him in magnet high school the following year and this was the perfect plan to prepare him for that. The last determining factor was our son and what he thought. I had a candid conversation with him and asked him point blank if he would be okay with going to high school next year. His face said it all! He smiled and said he would love it. That was that. He still needs to "apply" and get two letters of recommendation and submit a statement of intent. (The Director explained that they do this with all students to make sure they know the significance of moving to the High School and that it's truly THEIR choice to be there. Also, there are some things they will be giving up such as sports, dances, a HUGE prom, and misc. things that other kids get in public school.) Once he gets all the "red tape" done he will be set.
We have known for a very long time that he has always been an "underachiever" and had not been able to prove to everyone his TRUE potential. Even when he went to Magnet Middle School he never had to study. He was the type of student who could just listen to the lecture and absorb it like a sponge. At times (I was told) he would even CORRECT the teacher. He does that even to this day! His grammar teacher told me one day that he had corrected her during class. I was mortified!! However, she reassured me that he was very respectful about it and that he was actually right! He never seizes to amaze me.
Words can't begin to explain how proud I am of my son and all he has been able to overcome. He is growing up to be a kind, compassionate, caring, and wonderful young man. This past year he has proven to me that he can achieve any goal he sets his mind to. He has high ambitions to be a doctor, and I know that if that is what he wants to achieve then he will. I know his mind was a gift and it's up to me and my husband to nurture that beautiful mind of his. All we can do at this point is make sure that doors are open for him and if he chooses to walk through them then the rest is up to him.
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Intelligence is knowing more
than is expected............
Wisdom is taking full
advantage of it.
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