In the LDS religion we believe in a premortal existence. That means that we existed as spirit children of our Heavenly Father before we came to earth and gained a mortal body. That is why we often refer to one another as Brother and Sister....because we truly are sons and daughters of God.
Today I had a very interesting conversation with one of my friends from church. She is pursuing a master's degree in Special Education. She told me how she loves working with children who have special challenges because there is such an "innocence and sincere heart" when speaking to them. I told her about my experiences with the special education department at my local school and how I have had the opportunity to volunteer and help them. I was able to help in the Pal's Class where they have children with Down's Syndrome and severe autism. They are in there until they begin fourth grade and then they go on to another classroom. Let me tell you.....they are the sweetest and most loving kids you will ever meet. I feel it a privilege to know them. They have their challenges that's for sure, but their smiles and their sweet spirits make it all worthwhile.
I often wonder what it would be like for a parent to know that their sweet baby is going to be born with such a handicap? Is it better to know or does it hurt less if it happens gradually? I am sure there has to be a roller coaster of emotions. There is probably a period of grief that a parent experiences in knowing that all their dreams and expectations they had for their child would have to change. There might be a period of denial. Then....there is the transformation and a change occurs. It's not with the child, but with the parent. I have seen it happen with friends and have observed it in others. It becomes evident that these children have a greater purpose than anyone can comprehend.
Many have asked the age old question: Why would a loving and kind Heavenly Father bring these spirits to earth and give them such a heavy burden to bear? The answer is that their burden is only temporal. Spiritually they are blessed. In our church, if a child is born with such a handicap they don't even have to be baptized. They are so innocent in the eyes of God that they cannot sin. They are special spirits sent from above to teach all of US a lesson. They had progressed so much in the premortal existence that all they needed was to obtain a body. Their lives on earth do have meaning AND purpose. If they COULD talk, they would probably tell us, "don't feel sorry for me....but love me...this life is but a season compared to eternity and we WILL return back to our Heavenly Father one day and see one another for who we truly are."
When I look into the eyes of these precious angels in the Pal's Class I can see the innocence and love in their eyes. They uplift and encourage one another. When one is praised about good behavior, for example, they ALL light up and show their excitement. They don't think twice about showing their love either. I get tons of hugs and you can't help but to love them back. Another thing I have noticed is how special the PARENTS are! The special education teacher made a comment one day that I will never forget. She said that, "it's not by chance that these kids were born into these families." I believe that too.
I am thankful for the trials that I have been given. They have helped ME to progress and grow. I appreciate what is important and I try not to stress about the small stuff. I always tell myself that God will only give me what I can handle. What doesn't kill us only makes us stronger, right? I am thankful for the children that I have been blessed with. It breaks my heart whenever I speak to my friends who cannot conceive and who I know would make absolutely wonderful parents. I always feel a greater appreciation for motherhood. It is a divine calling and one that I don't take lightly.
No matter what your trials are don't lose sight of the greater picture. You are instruments by which Heavenly Father takes care of his little ones. It's your job to teach them and guide them. Religion is very important and I know it's because of my faith that I have been able to endure and rejoice. It's no easy task, but the blessings are overwhelming. When I tuck my babies in at night (yes...even my almost twelve year-old) I cherish the moment and I make sure to tell them each individually how much they are loved. If I've done my job right, their last thoughts as they drift into sleep will be, "I am loved."
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"The best and most beautiful things in the world
cannot be seen or even touched. They must
be felt within the heart." - Helen Keller
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