One of my crusades is also in educating parents about ADHD and what options they have. The only option I was given for my #1 was medicine!! That was it!! They talked a bit about behavior modification but they didn't expand on it. They also warned me that it would take months and possibly a year to figure out how much dosage to give, AND that it could change as he got older. Little did I know.....that was only the beginning.
Let me begin with what I like to call: the "Guinea Pig" treatment. Your child will begin a course of treatment that will entail taking some kind of stimulant such as Ritalin, or Adderall, or now Concerta. IF your child suffers from depression the doctor might even suggest antidepressants. So...then you will begin by taking either the lowest dosage possible and then going up from there or in some cases taking somewhere in the middle and then lowering it. It takes about a month or so before you know if it is working and then you will probably have to adjust it a few times after that. If you have side-effects (which we did) then you will have to change drugs and start ALL over again! Yep....it's a vicious cycle and one that I would not wish on my worst enemy.
I think it's important to let you all know the side-effects that WE encountered. My child was definitely full of energy and loved life. He was extremely smart and at times he was a bit strong-willed. The main reason we had him diagnosed was because when he was three his preschool teachers complained about his inability to sit still and focus. We ignored them at the time because we felt that he was too young for them to expect him to sit still for 30 minutes! However, we decided to look further when he went to Kindergarden and his teacher complained about his inability to sit still for long periods of time and mentioned he had attention deficit issues. We took their advice and got him tested. We were told he had a mild case of ADHD and so we began with Ritalin. Let me tell you, he was a totally different child! He was definitely calmer and seemed to be able to focus better. We saw his handwriting improve dramatically and his art ability was enhanced on the drug. HOWEVER, he also began to exhibit terrible mood swings and lost his appetite. He was a rather skinny kid and so he didn't have a lot of weight to spare. He also was not happy. He seemed to be in a "zombie" state and it just wasn't him. At the time, he couldn't communicate very well and so we couldn't talk about it. He just didn't look or act very happy. We started by lowering his dose and changed to a time-release capsule to make sure he got a steady stream of drug. None of it seemed to help. Then we changed to Adderall. At first I thought this was going to be the "magic bullet". However, it had even worse side-effects. Eventually, he became high strung and would get his feelings hurt very easily. He would cry at the drop of a hat. I felt like he was in a state of depression. He did not eat very well and so continued to lose more weight. His first grade teacher actually told me that she felt he was being "paranoid" about things happening at school. He felt like people were "out to get him" or "talking about him". If that weren't enough.....I noticed one day that he had these dots on his back and realized it was his backbone rubbing against the bed at night and causing bed sores! That was definitely it for me.
Well.....he finished out the first grade in a private school (with medicine, per teacher request). I decided to do a little research on ADHD. I discovered the INTERNET!! It's my new best friend. I just love Google! I also purchased a few books and the one I would totally recommend to people is The ADD Answer By: Frank Lawlis. It's an AWESOME book!! It explains ADD in a way I had never understood before. It also shows that there ARE ways to test for it medically and not just a questionnaire. That is just too biased in my opinion. The book also talks about medicine and how it works in the brain. It also warns that medicine should NOT be used as a LONG-TERM treatment. It also gives you an awesome resource of information concerning diet and how that alone can treat some kids. I never heard anything about that from doctors before. As a matter of fact, after reading the book I realized that my child's diet consisted mainly of carbs. I started to be more conscious about the food he ate and it made the world of difference!!! In the morning, I made him eggs instead of the sweet cereal or poptarts that he just loved. I saw a great improvement in his ability to focus. It was amazing!! Red dye was another trigger. I didn't realize how it affected him!
After much thought and prayer, I decided to homeschool my #1. It was the best decision I could have made. I just didn't want him to go to school during this transitional time for us. I had decided that I was not going to give him any more medicine and I knew if I put him back at school that they would pressure me into doing it. While I homeschooled I was able to focus on his behavior and teach him how to ignore distractions. I found out that the main reason he could not sit still in his seat was because he was bored! He would finish his work and then would get in trouble because he would want to speak to his friends. Also, he was so skinny that I am sure it hurt for him to sit still for too long. (That was something that Frank Lawlis actually experienced and talks about in his book.) There were other things too that I found out about my child. I found out that he would actually listen while doing some of the things the teachers were complaining about. In other words, it looked like he wasn't listening, but he was! There are different kinds of learners and obviously he is not a visual learner at all. He actually did better when his hands were busy. I compare it to the adults who will doodle on a sheet of paper while talking on the phone. It's basically the same thing. He was so smart that he had figured out a way of calming himself down. Unfortunately, it looked like he was not paying attention to the teachers.
To make a loooooong story short..... we were able to complete 2nd and 3rd grade in one year! He was so easy to teach and he was like a sponge absorbing all of the information faster than I could give it to him. I made sure to test him and give him plenty of seat work so that he would be ready for school. When it came time for him to go back to public school, he started in the 4th grade and finished with flying colors without ANY medicine!! He had the best teacher who was strict but very loving. It made the world of difference and I was so proud of him!
I hope this story gives you all the hope of what can be achieved. The moral to my story is to get as educated as you can about your child's condition. If you have a diagnosis then find out what that means. Read books and talk to other parents. Unfortunately, I didn't have any parents to talk to and so I was basically alone in all of this. I just wish I could have had some kind of support or someone to talk to that could relate. It's totally different when you have been down this road before. PLEASE.....consider your options. My wish is that I can spare others from what I went through. It's not fun and it's not worth it. If your child has a mild case of ADD/ADHD then consider changing the diet or making sure he gets enough sleep....limit computer and television time.....Also, I have learned that consistent and loving discipline does wonders! Try it....what do you have to lose?
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A child's loving smile is the best medicine in the world.
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